1) It's not gay if it happens in a Vietnamese prison.

2) It's not gay if you can't lift your arms over your head.

3) It's not gay if he's a "Hockey Mom."

4) It's not gay if he's a "Maverick."

5) It's not gay if his pitbull wears lipstick.

6) It's not gay if you're just "friends."

7) It's not gay if you're desperate.