We're not quite sure what we like more about comedian Robert Selander, the fact that his MySpace page lists his occupation as a Death Instructor, or the fact that his fan club states that all members receive one free taco. Heck, who are we kidding, we like the taco part the most. You can catch up on all things Robert Selander, including his videos and fan club benefits, at RobertSelander.com and his MySpace page at MySpace.com/RobertSelander.

Q: How would you describe your comedic style?

RS: Well Simon, my comedic style can best be described in this recipe for "Chunky Cherry Muffins"--
INGREDIENTS:
• 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 cup old-fashioned rolled oats
• 3 teaspoons baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 3/4 cup light brown sugar, packed
• 2 large eggs
• 6 tablespoons butter, melted
• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 3/4 cup buttermilk; low fat is fine
• 1 1/2 cups coarsely chopped cherries, about 8 ounces
• 3/4 cup chopped pecans
PREPARATION:
Line muffin cups with paper liners or spray well with a baking spray. Heat oven to 375°. Cook for 15 minutes. Serve when funny.

Q: Your MySpace page lists your occupation as "Death Instructor." How are the benefits for that? Good medical and dental? 401k?

RS: At the Death Emporium we get all kinds of fancy perks like 25% off anything from Bath & Bodyworks and free pretzels from the food court. Plus there is a peephole to the Victoria's Secret women's dressing room in the break room. Tee-hee.

Q: Which person has been LEAST influential in your career?

RS: Robert Selander.

Q: Which project have you enjoyed the most while performing with the theatre company The Primitive Screwheads?

RS: When I got to play Ash in "Evil Dead: Live!" I got beat up, chopped off my own hand, beat myself up, got shot in the face with blood, killed zombies, flipped around all over the place, and screamed a whole lot. It was fun. Sexy fun. Like sex. When you have it. With another person. All sexy-like. Sex.

Q: Your personal site is known as "Robert Selander's Website of Doom." How much more powerful is it compared to Indiana Jones' Temple of Doom?

RS: You mean http://www.robertselander.com? Where you can see all my videos? Where you can join the Robert Selander Fan Club and get a free taco (see question seven)? Where you can buy fantastic Robert Selander goods? It is pretty powerful. Way more than The Temple of Doom. My website of DOOM will make you poo... backwards.

Q: You recently wrote a blog about bombing onstage. How big is the temptation to just drop the mic and bolt in the middle of a horrible set?

RS: That was fiction my friend. You should read my other blogs. Like the one I wrote about cockroach gladiators or my mystic adventures with the elderly bag lady. Those are all real. I never bomb. Unless you mean when I blow up the place... with laughs! HAHAHAAA!!!

Q: What is the strangest request you've received from a member of your official fan club?

RS: Once I put out an ad that said if you joined the Robert Selander Fan Club, I'd send you my pubes in addition to the taco you get when you join. So this girl responded saying she wanted to join, but only if I really sent my pubes. I sent her a fan club card, welcome letter, the customary taco, and a bag of my very own pubic hair. A few weeks later she wrote back after she got them in the mail. The girl was very pleased and said she was going to add it to her "hair collection."

Q: Where can we catch more of your work and stay updated on your career?

RS: You can find everything Robert Selander related at www.RobertSelander.com. Or you can just invite me over to you house and I'll tell you over a hot, steamy cup of tang.

Q: With the close of 2007 fast approaching, what are your goals for 2008?

RS: My main goals for 2008 are to do a bunch of shows, hump some sandwiches, make a bunch of videos, and learn how to not be so damned sexy all the time.

Q: We end all interviews with word association. I say wombat and you say...

RS: MORTAL COMBAT!!! (Then there's a bunch of techno music and I make a wombat's head explode)...FATALITY.