It's no surprise to anyone who knows me that I'm writing this, as I am an ardent Halo fan, but it was a bit of a surprise even to me how impressed and moved I am with Halo 3's campaign. I tried hard to go in with lowered expectations, and I think I succeeded. Maybe it was that lower expectation that helped me enjoy...

1) Good fortune shines on the gifted and talented. Therefore you will have none.

2) Even though times may seem grim, remember that things...

1) Movie blabbing - I'm glad that you enjoyed the latest action film, really, I couldn't be more happy for you. In fact, I'd like to see it myself. But please, don't be an idiot and tell me how the movie ends, or even that it has a "twist ending." Do you know why a twist ending works so well? Because you don't see it coming! But, thanks to you...

1) It's not cheating if you play footsy between stalls in an airport restroom.

2) It's not cheating if it lasts less than...

We have no idea what got Simon all riled up about Halo 3, but it's obvious something (or someone) got under his skin. Feel free to send us an e-mail if you'd like to play against us in the glorious online world of Halo 3.

1) Post game bitching. - Stop telling me "Yeah, um, you wouldn't have won if not for...

1) Always pursue your dreams even though you will achieve none of them.

2) Your miniscule abilities will take you to...

1) You die today. Poison in fortune cookie. You should read fortune first!

2) She's way out of your...

1) I met one of my all-time favorite authors and, whether it was because I'd built up the meeting or he was on the last day of the tour, he seemed to be kind of a jerk.

2) Michigan squirrels threw tiny, diseased apples...

1) It's not cheating if she's a tiger in the sack.

2) It's not cheating if your friend double dog dares you...

Kristen Cavallari

Where to see her: Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County (TV)...